Using their global contacts, the Jeffersonian has leveraged the LHC to read one of the numerous scrolls found near Herculeum. It turns out buggery was a great favorite of the period and a pasttime most adults engaged in regularly.
And in related news the BRICS group are now reportedly working on finance for a Bitcoin Slayer that uses proof of stake. Palantir has been backdoored and en clair dossiers on every tech titan are now circulating in darknets. The USG is predicted to fall before the singularity and start an unstoppable chain of collapse travelling around the world. Man bites dog. News at eleven.
Weather predicted - Stormy. Chance of Heil
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